To know me is to love me unconditionally.
To love me unconditionally; is to accept all my imperfections, my weird mind, my different personalities, my mood swings, my mental illness, and my physical disabilities without judgment.
To know me is to be close to me and be able to share our opinions openly.
To know me is to be that person who will check me when I am wrong, but won’t hold it against me.
To know me is to understand I am trying to find myself spiritually and won’t participate in certain things, but you are still cool with that.
To know me is to know when we have a problem with each other we can talk it out.
To know me is to know when I tell you I love you; I mean it from the bottom of my heart.
To know me is to know when I am mad I will talk crap and then drop it.
To know me is to know I do not hold grudges, anger, or bitterness in my heart.
To know me is to know I am a person who is very selective of the company I keep.
©Painbug 2020
Tag: Feelings
Me, Myself and I….👩🏽😮🙃‼‼‼
I can love you with every ounce in my body and kill every ounce of myself.
I can praise you with beautiful words and destroy myself with one word.
I can help shape you into the person you should become at the same time I can crush the person I am.
I can support you in every way and abandon myself.
I can be your fan and my worst critic.
I will not allow anyone to hurt you but will turn around and destroy every inch of myself.
I can love myself more while you quietly fade away.
I can learn to put me first and place you in the background.
I can be the loudest person in the room while shutting you down.
I can excel and thrive while you fall and fail.
I can be myself, and at the same time, I can allow you to show up and show out.
I can be many shades in the dark and in the light. I can fulfill many roles; it just depends on the day and mood.
I can learn to accept the things I can not change and let go of the things I can.
I am comfortable in my skin. I am a work in progress!!!!
©Painbug 2020
Faith not Sight
I rely on my faith more these days than ever before. ” Walking by faith, not by sight”(2 Corinthians 5:7). In the present time, we can’t let sight lead us if we allow that to happen it will lead us into a black hole. The things we see are temporary and won’t last forever. I have come to realize things will never be the same or normal. The way we use to live has passed.
Now we are left with choosing between what is right or politically incorrect.
Your choices are:
- Continue to live your life the way you want with traveling, partying, hanging out with people not wearing a mask, risk getting yourself or someone else sick, or dying.
- Change your lifestyle limit traveling, socializing in person, hanging out, or doing things that require close contact with other people to keep yourself and everyone else around you safe.
These two choices have caused many issues with society. By what we can see government, politics, righteous, and unrighteous have influenced the decision an individual makes. Nowadays, They are guiding us in so many different directions. Our government has lost their minds. They are under the impression everyone is blind to the truth.
It is sad to say we heard these things as a child growing up. Be a leader, not a follower; I can remember this as clear as day. I even instill this same saying onto my children.
We were given a blessing from God with free will. Each human received the necessary tools needed to make wise decisions.
When you began to walk by faith; You can see the world’s view is different from yours. You can see, smell, and hear all the garage in between the lines. You can’t let what is going on in the world consume your life. You become a slave to sight.
2 Corinthians 4:18
© Painbug 2020
My Mood….
Had to Fired someone today. That’s tough! Its suck to sucks….
2020 Part 3…..
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com
It is interesting how this world changed in the blink of an eye. 2019 would be the last year things in the world were normal. People didn’t care about issues like racial disparities, police shooting, unexplained deaths, food shortages, and other serious concerns.
Now it is a new year the same issues except there is a twist. People were in virtual home prisons. Some states put in place restrictions that limited people from buying needed essentials for daily living. There were certain days when you were allowed to shop. It is hard to find some items such as Lysol spray, cleaning wipes, gloves, hand sanitizer, tissue,paper towels and disposable face masks. There were shortages of beef, chicken, pork, rice, and flour.
Technology usage became the source of schooling, work duties, and a communication platform. Who knew Zoom would rise for a communication platform for business, and churches.
Every day is a reminder of all the deaths that occurred due to a relentless virus. Some people are more paranoid about being around people and socializing in person because it can pose a risk to our health. Simple things such as traveling, partying, shopping, and even getting your hair is a high risk for contracting the virus.
Mental health disorders are on the extreme all-time high. Isolation has become the new normal. Face masks, gloves, and hand sanitizer are part of our daily wardrobe.
Now we are faced with making tough decisions regarding our children’s education. As a parent, we have to decide if we want to take the risk of sending your child back to school or keep them home. In my state, the numbers are steadily climbing, and the school district can’t provide a plan on how to keep our children safe while at school. Our Governor said “children do not transmit the virus-like adults”. They said it is safe to send children back to school regardless of the risk it poses.
How can we feel comfortable with sending children to school, when there is a controversial discussion going about wearing a mask to protect others. The simple task of wearing a face mask to protect yourself and others seems to be a violation of a person’s right.
COVID-19 has changed the world forever.
Photo by Yaroslav Danylchenko on Pexels.com
2020 is the year the world turned upside down and steadily spiraling downhill.
2020…. Part 2
We are only halfway through the year 2020.
In the last five months, it seems like an entire year has passed by.
To date, 2020 included events such as fires, floods, earthquakes, mass shootings, massive deaths and, a major pandemic.
In 2020 we have lost more lives then the world trade center attacks, the mass shootings, hurricanes, and tornadoes.
2020 is the year when technology was the only resource available to communicate with the world.
2020 is the year we seen politics true colors.
2020 is the year the President of the United States told us to ingest cleaning solutions to cure the COVID-19 virus(“He said he was being Sarcastic toward the media”).
2020 is the year the United States was represented by COVID-19 case colors on a map.
2020 is the year people started drawing closer, to Jehovah our GOD.
2020 is the year more people will rely on their faith to cope through this pandemic.
2020 is the year when I started using my common sense and started following my heart.
© Pain Bug 2020
Title-less…
I was so precious. I was unique and beautiful. I was innocent and pure. I was gullible and vulnerable. I was violated.
I was a child.
I was so alone. I was so confused and lost. I was scared.
I was robbed of my childhood.
You berated and belittle me constantly. You beat me and you neglected me. You abandoned me and left me to defend myself.
Most of all you hated me.
I looked to you for protection. I looked to you for help. I looked for you to save me.
I look for you to love me.
You gave me away like a piece of candy. You threw me to the wolves. You made me disappear. You remove the thought of me from your memory.
You killed me.
The new me surfaced and the old me was me cremated. The new me started achieving everything the old me was denied. The new me is stronger and tougher. The new me is bold and fierce. The new me is a warrior. The new me doesn’t look or yearn for you anymore. The new me shields my heart from you.
The new me forgives you for all the wrong you have done to me.
As I write this, I shed tears down my face. I cried not because of the pain, sorrow, shame, or the feeling of being let down by you.
I shed tears because I am happy.
Jehovah has blessed me with love and life 1 John 4:19. He shields me with faith, hope, and love. He feeds my soul Matthew 5:3
©Pain Bug 2020
Am I who they say I am?🧐👀👁👀
They say I will never amount to anything in life.
They say I am the spawn who walks the earth.
They say I will ruin everything I touch.
They say one look at me will scar you for life.
They say no one will ever like me.
They say I am ugly.
They say I should just crawl in a corner and dissolve away.
I say to them look closely in the mirror. I am just a reflection looking back at you.
©Pain bug 2020
Family……👨👩👦👦👨👩👧👧
Family, what does this word mean? Everyone has family issues. Everyone has relatives who are close, distant, and fake. We toss the word “Family” around very loosely. Sometimes people who aren’t blood-related become family.
The family visits are more than occasional BBQ get together. Family is more than a once a year visit from them. It is more than coming together when a family member passed away. Family is more than individuals who want to be bothered only when it is convenient for them. Family is more than making a call or text message because someone else has instructed them to do so. Family is more than the judgmental voice in your ear when times are bad. It is much more than being jealous of a person’s status. A family should not make you feel worthless, isolated, or abandon.
Families shouldn’t be selfish, non-supportive, or condescending to each other.
The family should always stick together. Your family should lift you when you are feeling down. Family is supposed to provide support mentally. When you are in trouble: family should come together and help you get through the rough time.
Occasionally, we need a family fight!!!!!
Families are dysfunctional, crazy, supportive, loving and caring.
Is this what it comes down too?
Really! We are really playing this game Who has the bigger balls? The earth has been pleaded with a beast called COVID-19 AKA Coronavirus. She doesn’t care about your social status, age, race, family, how rich, or how poor you are. She is a very feisty beast running havoc on the world swallowing us slowly.
This is the time when everyone should come together to find a solution. Naturally, one-sized doesn’t fit all situations. Sharing information can be beneficial for everyone during the brainstorming period. If all the different countries place their ideas and information together; pretty sure they can come up with some conscientious decision that works for this beast. People prefer to blame, call out, minimize, lie, and argue with each other. They are so concerned with blaming each other for the devastation the beast has caused. We can care less about the stupidly that is being displayed to the public. We just want this beast to stop killing our loved ones. She has destroyed so many lives in a short period. Rona(Coronavirus) has created a new normal for everyone. We all are scrambling to figure out what the next steps are. This beast has publically proved she is the dictator of this storyline. As soon as the government officials get their heads out of the clouds. Maybe we can start the climb out of this beast’s belly.
Yes, the world’s system of things has been compromised. People have lost jobs, companies, money, family members, and even worst their lives. Every time we turn on the television for guidance, we end up with misleading information. The death toll is steadily rising. The number of people with COVID-19 is still going up. There is some hope people are recovering from the sickness.
1 Thes. 5:17
