What is going on in this world today? Are we living in the last days?❔❓❔❓❔🕕🕕

We experience a magnitude of devastation events around the world recently. Every time you turn on the television there always something going on like wildfires, hurricanes, tornadoes, tsunami, earthquakes, mass shootings, police shootings, and a worldwide pandemic.

Some people are starting to question whether we are living in the last days? 

We all endure the pain and suffering. You begin to weep, your chest feels like it’s burning, and your heart feels so heavy. We start to become speechless. It’s hard to be transparent when the issues are transcending our understanding. The more you try to comprehend, the more elusive these situations are. 

Will we ever see a world without violence, pain, sickness, destruction, and death? Some people yearned to see the day when we can smile in a peaceful world

(Revelation 22:1-3).

 

Regardless of your religious belief, we all deep down look forward to the day when Jesus will come and end this world’s system of things

 (Revelation 11:15).

We need to start loving one another intensity from the heart 

(1 Peter 1:22, John 13:34,35). Now more than ever, we need to learn how to be a peacemaker, even if the other person has done us wrong

(Matthew 5:23,24).

We need to learn how not to hate and continuously forgive our brothers

(1 John 4:20, Colossians 3:12-14, Ephesians 4:32, 5:2).

When the world becomes too boisterous, you can always turn to Jehovah our God for peace and tranquility.

©Pain Bug 2020

Emotional feeling of “Self-Pity”

Self-pity is a mental struggle. It can be overwhelming to deal with. It’s a feeling you can’t control when it strikes. The flood gates of feelings rush in like an ocean of water during a hurricane. The aim is to destroy everything in its path.
It took a few years for me to realize I was exercising my right to indulge in the self-pity world. One day I realize what was going on in the middle of an episode. Then, I started to ask why I’m punishing myself like this? It was time for a meeting with myself. This conversion was really deep. I started wondering if there was something mentally wrong with me?
Started wondering about the physical and mental pain I was dealing with. I am not the person I use to be before this injury. My life has been dismantled before my eyes. I suffer pain and anxiety attacks daily. Now I suffer from other health issues.
On the other hand, as I started to analyze my situation. Yes, we are broken physically and mentally. Yes, the caliber of my life has changed. Yes, we are miserable at times. Yes, this pain and other health problems are a real pain in the rear to deal with. I asked myself, do I allow this to define who I am or do I want to live life the best way I can?
Whenever self-pity tries to show its ugly head; I quickly shut it down.

Don’t let it take over your world

10/26/2021-11/01/2021

I agreed to try the spinal cord stimulator trial for seven days. The day of the procedure wasn’t as bad as I initially thought. The trial procedure required me to be awake for the surgery. The surgery took place in the provider’s office. As usual, I felt fine until I went to the back. My anxiety was off the chain. I had second thoughts. I was trying to find any reason to get up and leave. My husband came with me for support. The nurse came and explained some things about the procedure. Another nurse came in and asked my husband to wait outside until the surgery was complete. I asked her if she was a good poker? They are only allowed to stick me twice. She assured me she was the best. What happened after she poked me? She blew my vein.
The next day the medicine wore off, and my back was sore and stiff; it felt like a monkey was on my back. I was able to change the stimulator levels via remote. The company representative called every day to see if the stimulator was working. The only issue I had was the tape was pulling the wires and my skin every time I moved. For the most part, the trial was a success. Hopefully, they will come up with a better way to secure the wires during the trial.

Flowers are comforting

I finally have some time to sit and chat a bit. Lately, I have been working on arts and crafts stuff. I discovered I like to create paper flowers and decorated vases. It is so relaxing and takes my mind to a different place. It can take me anywhere from two to four hours to make a flower from paper. I like the process of cutting and arranging these beautiful items.

An interesting fact is I don’t like live flowers. They look pretty for a while, but then they die. They draw bugs and require you to do everything you can to prolong the process of death. I was never a fan of plants or flowers. There is a tree in my front yard and looks pretty when the flowers are blooming. Then the tree turns into a horror scene with moss hanging and branches falling everywhere.

Papers flowers are pretty and last long without any maintenance required. You can be creative with the flowers you make. You can make what you want, different kinds, you arrange them any way you choose. I love colorful flowers. Flowers can bring out any room. Very eye-catching and unique. I do have to admit it is time-consuming to create and put them together. The best part of this process is when I have completed the arrangement. I love the way they turn out. I started accepting requests for flowers. I plan to advance my talent.

Below are some examples of my creations

If you are interested in, please message me

My mind is racing

My mine is racing I need it to take a pause. There not enough hours in the day to complete the things I want to do. I have neglect my writing. It has been replace with arts and craft. I learned how to do so much. My mind is at peace when I am doing crafting. I am thinking about starting to sell what I make. It seems the outside world has gone crazy. It’s hard to stay safe out here. The best think for me to do is stay to myself.

New and Improve

2020 is the year when everything changed for me. The things I was used to doing no longer interest me. I started working on projects that I would’ve never done. I had a lot of alone time to focus on myself. I begin to invest in things that would benefit myself and my family. I learn how to sew. It became a hobby sewing random things. I started out making face masks with filters, satin pillowcases, and hair wraps. There were a lot of damaged materials and designs that went into the trash. However, the more I practice, the more proficient I became. I have watched so many youtube videos I could have made one myself.

I started challenging myself with complicated projects. Whenever I was in a dark place mentally, I would start sewing something. Eventually had to step away and find something else to do with my time.
When 2021 came in, I started to wonder. Why are we spending so much money on things that do not fully represent our personality? My creative mind came into play. I had this idea but hesitated to spend the money on it. After a month of procrastinating, I purchase the required materials needed. I started to make paper flowers and design vases. I do not care for flowers. They draw bugs and do not last more than a few days to a week. They pretty and expensive, but do not last long. So I felt why not create something that is inexpensive and will last long.
I do not celebrate holidays. I had to think of a reason for giving flowers as a gift. We all heard the saying, ” Give me flowers while I am living, not when I am dead.” It became my mission to give my closest friends and family their flowers now. I learned I am not consistent with designs, but it just means each design is unique.
I ended up making my first sale. My friend asked me to make one for her mother. It was my pleasure to create something that was from the heart.


I like to start a small business making arts and crafts.
2020-2021 has brought out some hidden talents. It has taught me a few techniques to deal with my anxiety and stress. This world has become more stressful than most people can handle. I learned if you have faith, you can overcome anything this world throws at you.
Wake up every day with a smile on your face. Thank God and be happy. Let the stress of the world stay in the world.

My Friday….

My Friday was like every other day the last six weeks. What can I do today? I recently started some new projects to occupy my mind during the day. I went back to making crafts. I really enjoy arts and Crafts when I was younger. Life has a way of taking your attention off of things you liked. Since 2020, I have been tuning into a part of me which was buried. I have reunited with one of my old personalities. She has been quietly tuck away in the back. She resurfaced when life slowed me down. I always knew there were different personalities being displayed in different periods of my life.

This person is more lay back, loving, eager, spiritual, and just don’t care about what people think or have to say about her. I guess she shields me from this world and its craziness. She also rely on God and his son the Christ Jesus for spiritual love and hope.

She doesn’t mind being in her own world, because it’s quite and peaceful. She is the peace maker between us. She is very slow to anger and quick to act. She believes actions speak louder than words. She accepts things for what they really are, and learns how to maneuver around them. She also believes we all need to enjoy the little things in life.

Part 1

©Painbug 2021

Fight song

You came like a thief in the night. In a blink of an eye, you stole all my possessions, my fight, my strength, and my control. You left me with sorrow, stress, pain, low self-esteem, and self-pity. When the clouds dissipated the next day, I heard a voice it said to me: smile, shout, and rejoice for what has been stolen will be replaced ten times over. You are never alone if you walk with me.

Shake off that old skin and show them how relentless you are. Show them through your actions; your spirit will not be broken, no matter how hard they try.

©Painbug 2021